Liam's Birth |

At 24 weeks pregnant with our first child, my husband and I decided to attend a tour of the hospital that we would be delivering in (as we would not have the chance to attend the tour with childbirth ed class, we were practicing the Bradley Method on our own). After waiting an hour for the unorganized staff to find someone to actually lead the so called monthly scheduled tour, we were led around by an annoyed labor and delivery nurse. As we stepped into one of the labor/delivery/recovery rooms, I whipped around to my husband and said "I am not delivering here!". The group of couples piled into the elevator and as they got off at the next floor, we stayed on and waved as the doors closed. We walked right out of the front doors of the hospital and drove home. I cried the whole way home, yelling "what are we going to do!?". My husband mentioned the Bradley stuff and homebirth. I agreed with him, as I had always wanted to do the homebirth thing.

I composed myself and when we got home, I went straight to the computer to search for a midwife. I found two, emailed them both and explained my situation (hyperemesis, no weight gain, actually lost 20 lbs, 24 weeks, not having the baby in the hospital!). They both emailed me back, one with a very short answer, the other with an answer longer than my original letter. We made a date to meet at a local coffee shop. We met our midwife and her partner, my burley, husband expressed, with his very large arms crossed, that we were not doing the hospital thing, because no one was going to take his baby to a NURSERY and may let him see him after they were done with him. The midwives were impressed with a father so passionate about his baby's welfare. We all fell in love immediately. The ladies scheduled my prenatal appointments quickly, and they were all planned to be in my home...not in an office! At about 6 weeks before our little Liam was due, we purchased our first home and moved in right away (I wouldn't recommend that an 8 month pregnant woman move anything, much less an entire house full of stuff!)

The birth...
At 38 weeks, I was contracting painlessly every now and then. My OB, who had volunteered to be our backup, met with me to do a prenatal (I kept the OB while also seeing the midwives). I asked her to check me to see if I was dilating. After what felt like she was digging for my tonsils from the other end, she said that I was approx. 2 cm dilated. I found out later, she was probably stripping my membranes (separating the bag of water from the cervix, breaking the fibrous tissue).

I had my midwives come over and check things out, I was about 4 cm by then. Still no painful contractions. As the days went along, I dilated a bit more and more. Finally I was at 7 cm, and bored...my husband and I were just hanging out around the house, as it was the weekend. That Sunday I called my midwife and said "I've HAD IT! We've got to get things moving, I'm tired of waiting!" She suggested a few homeopathic things to try, and said that she would come by later that evening to help me out. She showed up and I took some homeopathic remedies to get things going. She said that if they were to work, they would work in about 45 minutes. She said that she had to go and pick up a few things from the store, and that she would be back, to call her immediately if something started.

So we hung around. I was afraid that nothing was going to work! 45 minutes came and went, I started to get sad, then at 50 minutes, BAMM!!! I got a huge contraction that lasted about 7 minutes, not painful just really hard and took my breath away. I instinctively drew myself a very warm bath and slipped in, while my husband called the midwife. She came right back to our house, arriving around midnight. My contraction softened and I was able to relax for a little while, polish my fingernails, laugh with my hubby and our midwife. All the while she was monitoring me and the baby, we were doing fine. The other two midwives came soon after. We all sat around laughing and joking until things got a bit more intense. The ladies went downstairs to let my husband and I bond and work through the more intense contractions alone.

After he was beginning to annoy me with his joking, he knew (from our studies) that I was near transition. I asked him to get the ladies to come up to our bedroom. They came back up and we all sat around; they watched me as I sat on the edge of the bed and breathed through the contractions. Everyone was whispering words of encouragement as things got intense. After I started to get double peaking contractions (one almost ending, and the next one starting right in the middle of the ending one), they suggested that they break my water. We all discussed my fear of more pain, my husband and I decided to just get it over with. They tried for a while to get it (we found out later that my bag was VERY strong, they could hold up my placenta by the bag, without it tearing) and finally got it! Splash! I had always heard that it was warm, but I had no idea of the warmth water, it was great! And then came the painful contractions! And the cervical lip! And for those who have no idea of what a cervical lip is, it is a part of the cervix that has difficulty dilating. I personally feel that this is to blame for many of the c-sections in the hospitals, it can be seen as "failure to progress". Many midwives will hold this lip up while the baby's head passes through, I don't think that many doctors would take the time to do this. My midwife did this for me...it was the most painful thing that I had ever experienced, but much better than needing for transfer with a baby head crowning (try to walk just to the bathroom with a baby head in your crotch...nearly impossible!).

The baby passed through the lip and there was his little head, very much crowning! I was yelling so loud at this point (approx. 6 a.m.) that I was somewhat afraid that our neighbors would call the cops on us. That thought quickly passed. With three midwives supporting my perineum, my husband kneeling next to me, I pushed our little Liam down. His little head popped out! AHHhhhh, much better! Then I had to wait a second, he had his hand up by his face (they said it was no wonder he had such a hard coming down) and he had his cord in his hand...if he had to come out of that warm place, he was taking his food with him. They gently helped his cord off of his hand, and then said grab your baby! I reached down and slipped my hands under his tiny arms and slowly pulled him from my body to my chest. RELIEF!

I finally had my little one! I took one look at him and through my surreal haze said, "you're weird!", the room roared. What I meant was that it was very strange to me that this little baby was what was inside of me...I was totally freaked out! We snuggled for a while, while we waited for the placenta to come. We did not cut the cord (this was very important to us, as I am Rh neg. and my husband is Rh pos., if careful precautions are taken, the mother's blood will not mix with the baby's, lessening the risk of maternal sensitization). The placental came out, slowly. This was the BEST feeling EVER!!! Almost immediately after the placenta was out, I got the shakes (the rush of hormones), my momma midwife, stopped them immediately with some pressure points on my feet. Soon after, a warm bath was waiting for me and my tiny new little guy. I slipped in and the ladies handed him to me. We snuggled in the warm water while my husband sat beside us, just tearfully watching us.

After about 30 minutes in the tub, I was tucked into my own bed, my husband in the glider with our little baby, the midwives cleaning everything up and starting the washing machine. About an hour and a half after the birth of our son, my husband took him downstairs to make calls to our family and friends and I slept, in our bed.

This amazing experience, had me hooked. I will never birth my children in another place, they will always be born at home (barring any problems, of course). I feel that by giving birth at home, I am giving my babies the best, safest, most gentle beginning that I can. I will take all of the pain in the world to give this to my children.